Game over, kiddos. I just found the ultimate road machine in the Dallas area. https://dallas.craigslist.org/mdf/cto/d/1974-volkswagen-type-2-bus/6368234264.html
It runs, and it comes in at $4995 dollars.
Not only can it fit all of Finalchan, but you get to bring your own seat. Folding chair, lawn chair, grandpa's recliner, it doesn't matter.
No radio, so we can cruise down the road listening to the roar of memes.
Need to take a shit and the nearest rest stop is 20 minutes away? No problem, just lift the cardboard from the floor board and shit right on to the road. Watch out for splash back!